Well everyone, it’s that time again! Time for gun show stories! I’m set up at the beautiful Gonzales Gun Show across from the jerky guy. It’s 30 minutes to opening and so far I’ve had to deal with the following:
A: A dealer with an FFL asked me to sell him some guns. I ask him what he wants to buy. Answer: nothing retail. He needs to get some stuff on his table so he can make money. I show him what I get for a few items and tell him I’m in business to make money not work for nothing. He then gets mad and tells me that he’ll just order them wholesale. Good luck with that.
B: Another guy setting up sees me rolling in merchandise and asks me if that’s the loading zone.
FC: Well it depends.
1: It depends?
FC: Where’s your setup in the building?
1: Gee I don’t know we just got here.
FC: Depending on what spot in the building you’re at…….will determine where you want to unload.
1: I JUST ASKED A SIMPLE QUESTION YOU DON’T HAVE TO GET MAD!
FC: I’m not getting mad, I just don’t know where your table is! You asked a complicated question!
C: Another dealer told me he wants the Ruger Wrangler in black on my table. Finds out it won’t accept a 22WMR cylinder and scraps the sale.
The show is 25 minutes from opening. I don’t know what’s worse. The customers or the competition.
This thread will be updated as the day continues on with more tales of idiocy.
Edit: First morning update.
SHIT it has been BUSY.
I had a guy ask for a Smith and Wesson BodyShield. Whatever that is.
Three guys asking for Glock clips.
I guy asks for a Springfield XD magazine. I have a spare and I tell him $40. The guy said “hey can you do 30?” and I showed him the laptop screen from RSR showing him what stuff costs us. He pays me $40.
Guy walks up asking for a Glock fotay. Model 27 gen 4 or 5. I tell him no dice, but I can scrounge up one for him. He says do it. $800 cash hits the table. My order book writes it up. I tell him I’ll get it handled ASAP. Hop on gunbroker and buy what he wanted for $569 shipped. I’ve now paid for all the expenses of the weekend in one transaction. The rest of the weekend is profit.
Wrote up a 4473 bet. Glock 17 Gen 5 MOS. I said $725 out the door cash. He said $700 and it’s a deal. I said fine, lets make it interesting. $725 cash, $25’s the action. Fill out the form right, get the $25 back with your ID. If it needs ANY correction, I keep the $25 and go to dinner with it. He says it’s a bet. I tell him the ONLY hint he gets off me is — READ EVERYTHING CAREFULLY ALL THE WAY TO THE END BEFORE YOU ANSWER. Front is straight. He answered no in 21L2 as a US citizen. I pocket the $25. This show just went from breakeven to sizably profitable.
Lady comes by with an FN 509. She wants the 5.7. No dealer in the hall has one left. I tell her I can score one off my network if she wants. Would be a week to get one in. $1500. A fat stack of hundreds hits the table. She asks for ammo. I pull out a full case of SS197. She asks if I take amex. Sure do. As Ric Ocasek from the cars likes to say….. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BDBzgHXf64
Few folks asking for “reasonably priced” guns — my response is “What is reasonable?” and I hear “guns under $200” and I laugh a little inside and I laugh a lot outside.
It’s almost lunchtime. My Jersey Mikes #13 is swimming in oil and vinegar. I’ve been up since 5AM to get here on time and I skipped breakfast. Might treat myself to a nice thick steak at Mortons tonight.
Edit: Afternoon update
Things have been busy this afternoon. Wrote up all my Glock 19’s — standard and MOS and I’m now 100% sold out of Glock 19’s. Cranked off a Sub 2000 9mm Glock magazine gun at $625.
Just wrote up two Glock 17’s at $550 each.
Guy comes by.
“Hey, if you can’t guess my wife’s age within 2 years, can I get that Ruger 10/22 for $100?”
I look at his wife.
FC: Listen up, I might be the only guy in the show booking action on prop bets — but I only do so on stuff I have a house advantage on.
“How about three years?”
FC: No.
“Well it was worth a try! Thanks!”
Editors note: How whipped do you have to be to try to hustle your way into a Ruger 10/22 for $100? Are your finances so tight you can’t spend about $350 on a new squirrel slayer? This is the most pathetic thing I’ve ever seen in years.
I’m ready to get home. Or get steak. Probably steak.
